5 What the Hell??!!

 Sometimes, emotions has to be spelled out or the damn world will make you regret one day for not doing so. And to be very frank, I have never done this before but I always wanted to feel the "Awesomatic" (this is my own word to describe which is more than awesome) feeling after spelling out the thing which I had hidden inside.

I would like to share few of my 'highly irritated moments' in which I almost wanted to give a punch to the person who has irritated me like hell and wanted to tell him/her "Damn It! Get the hell outta here or Ur gonna lose your head now"

As you all can easily guess, these situations usually happens in our work place. And the next point is, Yes! It happened for me there. And now! This very moment! I was very happy, delighted, overjoyed!!! Cos, I at least have the courage to pen it down here wherein during that awkward moment I wasn't able to show my emotions out.

Here comes the best one!
I would never say that it was a fine day. Because it wasn't. Unfortunately, A client came to my place to have a talk with me. I never know that he is gonna come until I received his card from my security. (Well, its a lie! Actually, I forgot that he is gonna come) I stood still once when I saw his name on his card. Finally, I managed to seat them in one of the finest rooms (which was really tough to find out and which I borrowed for few mins) in my office and I sat with them for further discussions. Within few minutes, The land line near me gave me a break from the client's questions as I got a call. And for Gods Sake, I had no other choice than picking up the call, which I don't want to. So I did it! It was from the top (my boss)!!

Top: Why are you attending the call in this land line?
       (Not even a hello)
Me: Sir, A client came sir, I was discussing with them.....
Top: Client ah??? Who asked you to meet the clients there? Why are you meeting them there? OK where is                
        'X' (to whom I have borrowed the place and room) Ask him to call me at once.
Me: Ok sir. Sure

The next moment when I opened my mouth to talk to the clients... Tring Tring!! Tring Tring!!
Again!! The Top!
Top: Why are you meeting your clients there? Can't you ask them to come and meet in head office?
       (Its bcos our infra was too bad)
Me: Sir, I am talking to them. (With all the bloody emotions controlled inside)
Top: Call me once when they leave.

In the meanwhile, The clients were looking at me like " Oh no! poor u buddy"

You know what guys?? All I could do is JUST IMAGINE.
Damn it!! What the hell?? Can't you see that am talking to the clients? Its none of my business that the Infra was not good.
Could you please shut the hell and Let me try to create a good name before my clients. And now you are gonna get it! Yes! Come on take it! Punch!! Punch!!Punch!!

Imaginations are really "Awesomatic"!!!!!!!!!

Back to the story, It ended up with a soft argument between me and Top.

4 'Ups' & 'Downs' of My Life

                      Well, I know its been a long time. Hope everyone is fine and everything is going smooth. I do not have any specific reason which have stopped me from blogging. Its just few new experiences that have prevented me from blogging. We all know life has ups and downs. I, being tired of all the 'downs' and looking the 'ups' in each and every moment of my life. I am not sure whether I have the strength to face all the 'downs' but still I look forward for the 'ups' which we all wanted for.

                       Every time in my life, when I was about to take a decision or when I was about to take a move or a start, I have faced difficulties and sorrows surrounded and seated near me. It first started when I have completed my tenth grade. I was expecting 450/500 and I scored 436/500. It's not a very big difference. Though, I showed a mourn face and sat at the corner of my home. I was dumped by the ideas and decisions of all my relatives, neighbors and friends in choosing the group with which I have to choose my career further. All I wanted is to go for Maths & Biology and I had a dream of  becoming a doctor. I know it sounds crazy! Its a crazy world yaar!!!

                       Finally, I have completed my twelfth grade with the worst performance in the last two years. I was a bright student till my tenth grade and I became a low performer in the end of my school days. I did not mind that. I did mind when I got my results in my hand. Again the same scene has been created in my house. I was empty, helpless, dumped, kicked and lot more. I felt like I have lost all my way. I could see my friends moving on to coaching classes for their engineering entrance exams. Damn God! I hate engineering and Thank God! I didn't do it.

                      It took few weeks for me to come out of the sat corner of my home. Well, I should thank my mom, the most loveliest person in the world. Its her who initiated to choose a career in Law. I was wondering about my mom and the steps she would take to help me come out of the mourn, helpless world. She has done it. She made me to join in the entrance classes for the Law College. I was proud, full of pride, hands on clouds, excited. As usual, the shock was awaiting.

                      I am not sure whether its my bad luck or good luck, God has always stopped from the things for which I was yearning and the things which I would love most. Instead he will bless me with his own thing which has given me the uttermost happiness  (But at the first I would hate it like anything).

                     As Always, God had his own plans on me and he worked it very well which dropped my entrance classes for B.L. And finally, I was into Literature in an women's college. I was like.. Goddd!! What the hell??? Where did all the gent staffs go?? Soon, I got the answer.. There are no gent staff in this college, which made me feel worse.

Here comes the surprise!!! I had the most wonderful days in the same women's college which I hated the most and I came out with good language which still helps me out. Every 'downs' of my life has shown me that I'm not the good decision maker and I accepted all the better plans of God which took me to the way He always wanted to. Even when I used to feel worse at the beginning I was so happy on seeing the results.

0 Just Blogging

                         Yup! I was thinking a lot about blogging. But nothing struck my mind. So I thought what if I share my views and thoughts about my blog. And here comes the idea. How do I get my mind to blog at first? Well, just got bored out and wanted to do something new instead of just passing the time in facebook. I am a stupid who doesn't know more things about computer, internet and things related to that. At first, I really don't know anything about blog. But when my friends used me to ask like "Have you ever read his blog?" "Have you ever visited his blog?", I used to wonder what the hell was that. But now, I'm scribbling in my blog. Time has changed everything. I used to read more blogs about blogging and how we can make our blog interesting so that we can get more views and followers. I tried doing few of those things. Now, I feel like something has worked out in my blog and I feel that my blog is alive. I started blogging on October 14th, 2011 and so far my blog have got 165 views. God! Its unbelievable! And its beyond my extend. Thanks to everyone who has turned this stupid to a blogger.

5 My Song

தேடும் முன்பே நீ வந்தாய் 

உனை தேடும்போது ஏன் சென்றாய் 

விடியலுக்காய் காத்திருக்க நேரமில்லை 

வா நடப்போம் விடியும்வரை கைகோர்த்தே 

அறியா வயதில் அதைச் சொன்னாய்

அதை அறியும் முன்பே எனை வென்றாய்

1  மனதை மனதை பிரித்தெடுத்து 

    உன் காதல் தீர்ப்பை நீ எழுது

    தினமும் தினமும் உனை நினைத்து 

    படும் அவஸ்தை அது பெரிது 

    உன் ஓரக்கண்ணாலே

    என் நெஞ்சை கொய்தையே

    ஏனென்று அறியும் முன் 

    உள்ளதை புரியும் முன்  

    என்னென்ன செய்தாயோ.... நீ உயிரே!!    (அறியா)

2  புரியா புரியா புதிராக 

    நான் நின்றேன் தினமும் புதிதாக 

    உன் பார்வை பார்வை அதில் நனைந்து 

    உன் சிரிப்பில் தினம் புதைந்து 

    உன் காதல் உயரத்தை 

    நான் இன்று கண்டேனே 

    என்னையே மறந்தேனே 

    செவ்வானில் பறந்தேனே 

     சிறகடித்தேனே .......     உன்னாலே!!!         (அறியா)

0 My Desire which has given its root now

I always wished to become someone who has been recognized by everyone. Of course, this is everyone's dream and wish. But I do not know whether it will happen or not. Just wanna give a try.. may be a step ahead.

I remember that It was during my Eighth standard. I scribbled something. Actually, I tried to write some "Kavithai" (I don't want to mention in English as poetry doesn't have the beauty when compare to kavithai).

But it doesn't work during those days. Now, that's today.. I got a spark!! I took my official diary (which was near to me) and pen down the things. Its actually a song, butI didn't know anything about music. But I was able to give a tune to the lyrics which I have written. I'm impressed. I will update that soon.

0 Do friends have something to do with our desires?

Of course, They are our strengths. They are our weaknesses. I love my friends and desired to have lots of friends. But this is more than desiring.. Wanting.. Need.. Everything. I used to have lots of friends even during my childhood but none of them stayed with me. That is my bad luck. I used to fight with my mom supporting my friends. But, later I felt that I was mad about friends and tried not to do such things again. During my fourth std, I had two close friends. We used to wonder about the three stars lined in the sky. We used to compare them with us. I have wondered for years.. On seeing the stars. Those three stars stayed in the same line for years. Whenever I look at those stars I used to say to my mind that three is my lucky number. It fixed in my mind. Then, during my Eighth standard I got two dear friends again. Even they were with me till the end of my schooling. Then, they were in my friends' list but not dear ones or close ones. I was always desiring for a friend, who should always be with me, fight with me, kill me, hurt me and then should say I miss u idiot. I got one. With my friend I desired a lot like happiness to heaven, fights to hell, lots and lots of sharing, possessiveness, a good company and lot more. The first and the best one was ' a lifelong friendship' which did not happen and for which I'm longing for months. Friends are always episodes. But my friend is one who filled all those episodes alone.

My longing desire!
My best buddy ever!

0 What I have got from my desires

What do you think that you will get from desiring something or liking something or loving something.. may be someone.. They all have the same results. Just tears and nothing other than that. Even I got the same results. Have you ever felt this sort of pain? Feeling of piercing some sharp weapon in your heart. You can feel this sort of pain only if you really love a person. Yes, I was in love and I am in love. Wondering How long I will be in love. Because we cannot predict our future. Do you think loving someone is desire? Or do you feel like I'm scribbling here? May be you can have such feeling. I will give you the answer for it. The next step of love is marriage as everyone knows. After love, I desired to get married to the person whom I love a lot. There arises all the problems and I still struggling with that. So what I am about to say is think before you desire. Or if its late or if you have desired it by this time, be ready for the results.!!